Advice for Custodial Parent

Communicate With Your Child

Communicate with Your Child Effectively Before the Visit

It’s essential to prepare your child for their upcoming supervised visit with the non-custodial parent in a calm, reassuring, and supportive manner. Clear communication helps your child feel safe, understood, and emotionally ready for the visit, especially if they have questions or concerns.

  1. Explain the Situation in Age-Appropriate Language
  2. When informing your child about the visit, make sure to explain the situation in a way that aligns with their age and maturity level. Avoid overcomplicating details or using language that may cause confusion. For younger children, you might say, "You’re going to spend some time with [parent's name], and I know you will be in good hands." For older children, you can provide more context, such as outlining the specific times and what they can expect from the visit.

  3. Reassure Them of Their Safety and Support
  4. It’s natural for a child to have concerns, especially if the situation involves supervised visitation. Let your child know that the environment is structured to ensure their safety and comfort. Reassure them by explaining, “You’ll be with [supervisor’s name], who is there to make sure everything goes smoothly and that you’re well taken care of." Address any concerns your child might have openly and with empathy.

  5. Set Clear Expectations About the Visit
  6. Inform your child of the duration of the visit and any activities that might be planned. Children often feel more comfortable when they know what to expect. You can say, “The visit will last for [X hours], and you’ll get to spend time with [non-custodial parent’s name] doing [brief description of activity].”

  7. Encourage Open Dialogue
  8. Encourage your child to ask questions or express how they feel about the visit. Be patient and listen to their concerns without judgment. You might ask, “Is there anything you’re curious about or worried about for the visit?” By creating a space for open communication, you are helping your child feel empowered and involved in the process.

  9. Normalize Their Emotions
  10. It’s important to acknowledge that your child might have mixed feelings about the visit, and that’s okay. Let them know that whatever they are feeling—whether it’s excitement, nervousness, or uncertainty—is normal. You can say, “It’s okay to feel a little nervous. New experiences can feel that way, but you’ll have support throughout the visit.”

  11. Avoid Negative Comments About the Other Parent
  12. Ensure that your communication is neutral and free from any negative remarks about the non-custodial parent. Children should not feel like they are caught between their parents. Instead, emphasize the positive aspects of the visit, such as the opportunity to spend quality time with both parents in a safe environment.

  13. Reiterate Your Support After the Visit
  14. Let your child know that you will be there for them after the visit to talk about their experience if they wish. Offering emotional support both before and after the visit reassures your child that their feelings are valued and that you are committed to their well-being. You can say, “After the visit, we can talk about how it went if you’d like. I’m here for you no matter what.”

By following these steps, you can help your child feel more confident and comfortable about their visit, ensuring the experience is as positive and stress-free as possible.