The permissive parent at christmas

Yippee! It’s that time of year again when Christmas carols are resounding in the shops, alleys and temple gates. Christmas lights are already lit in the city centres and Christmas trees have been decked with every beautiful decoration you can think of. In the midst of all this excitement, some parents are under a lot of pressure to be in their kids good books.

The permissive parent is very much loved by all the high street shops because of his/her desire to give in to their children’s wishes in order to prevent anger and tantrums. How Barclaycard loves a permissive parent! They have good intentions and believe that by giving in to their child's desires, they are showing them love. They sometimes don’t set off to please their children all the time but because of their warm and nurturing manner they would rather avoid conflict or any kind of confrontation with their children. What are the characteristics of a permissive parent?

  • Lack of clear and firm boundaries
  • They give in to their child in the face of a temper tantrum or other expression of disapproval
  • They often do not apply discipline or logical consequences, or they apply them inconsistently
  • They are often manipulated by their children to get what they want, and the children play one parent against the other.
  • They sometimes feel like slaves to their own children because of the constant disrespect and manipulation. Hence after being pushed to her limit by non-compliance, this parent most often erupts with anger and frustration.
  • These parents normally have a peer relationship with their children rather than a parent-child relationship

While permissive parents feel that they are winning their children's love with their leniency, this type of parenting may generate unintended results. Children have a need to know what to expect, and in an overly lenient household where very few boundaries or logical consequences exist, these are the different ways this parenting style could impact on the children.

  • Children are more likely to lack the consistency required in their lives for security because setting clear boundaries provides consistency that allows children to feel secure.
  • When children function within determined boundaries, they develop a sense of pride, self-esteem, and citizenship within the family.
  • Children in permissive households may also learn behaviours that do not serve them well in adulthood, such as manipulative behavior, lacking a sense of self-discipline, and an inability to cope with authority.
  • Some children from such households have the tendency to talk back to their parents in a disrespectful way

Final word to the permissive parent is that, don’t think that your child will not love you if you practice tough love. The mother eagle teaches her young how to fly by shaking them from their comfort zone and dropping them from the heights. Sometimes the young eaglet is fearful of taking its first flight away from the nest so the parent withholds food to force it out. That is the only way the baby can shed off its fluffy wings to develop flying wings.

Enjoy stress free Christmas shopping!